Saturday, March 27, 2010

Violence and violation

Violation of the inner I is widespread in our society. We complain about pedophilia but children are violated in almost every other possible way and no one cares (it's considered ok to tell them what to do, where to go, what to do, who to see, how to behave, what to say, and all sorts of other things). This kind of traumatic behavior passes on to adults, and so we consider it normal to be told what to do and how to live in controlled manner all of our lives.

Why is violence against the individual so widespread and why does it seem to be an integral part of our society? Perhaps human design is not originally intended for gregarious living in such large numbers, and our large societies only become possible with widespread violence, symbolized for instance in religious practices and social traditions. The way in which we regulate human behavior is the greatest source of violence.

Of course, without such violence there seems to be only two options for large societies: consciousness or chaos.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

If I was a God

If I was a God, not just any kind of God, but the only thing that really Existed, such that nothing could harm me in any way: all-powerful, indestructible, no one else but me...

I could not be judged, no one could find fault in me... because I would be what Existed, and also else, was just a product of my thought and will.

There is such a place, in my imagination, I harm no one, no one knows what I imagined, and so I suffer no harm from whatever it is that I may imagine. No one suffers, no one knows, except me. In this particular setting, I am as close to this kind of God as I can imagine.

There is one startling particularity about this situation, it is the only one in which fear is non-present.

In our daily lives, we can die, we can be tortured, arrested, we can loose our house, we can end up on the streets, famine is a real possibility for the outcast, the one no one really cares if he lives or dies. Aren't they on the street already. The despise everyone gives them... would I want it for myself.

So fear from consequences restricts, not only my movements, but my every thought and desire. There are things which are good to desire, and others which we must desire, or else...

A simple example is "acceptance". A God would care nothing about being accepted by his thoughts. Who cares what the figment of His imagination thought about Him. It might be fun or repetitive, or boring or sensual. But nothing more than that would matter.

In this unique setting our true self arises. One that is not in fear, of anything, shows at last his true face. for what he truly desires is not now diverted or conditioned by the consequences that his desires may bring. They appear as they truly are.

So what are my true desires?

In other words, when I'm alone, completely alone, and I imagine a world as I want to, who am I, who surrounds me, what situations do I live?

Well, first of all, I am not alone. If I wanted to be isolated I could imagine a desert landscape. Perhaps somewhere between faraway Galaxies. A place without sound or images. Nothingness perhaps through all infinity.

That is not what I desire.

That is not what I imagine when I'm alone beyond all regards.

What I do imagine reflects either the opposite of what I am living in my material life (for instance a desert island if I am surrounded y too many people), or a situation in which I am the undisputed leader (in case I feel submissive), or I may imagine that I am adored (in case I feel neglected), or I may imagine myself flying through the stars (in case I feel a prisoner on earth).

But in all these cases one thing is common: I search for proximity, re-union, fusion. Desiring nothingness is rare, almost impossible.

The problem is that, it is easy to search for proximity, it is very difficult to find it. Knowledge, friendship, creativity, joy, are ways to feel reconnected again. But for me, the difficult thing to recognize, is that having is nothing when compared to being.

To be close to another one, we have to be him/her: to be fire like another's fire, to be water like his/her water, to be what no one can describe (the inner I).

Only then, in such vaporous, invisible, ways, can we hope to truly share what others are.

In the mean time, if I was a God, of that previous kind, nothing would escape my possession and dominion, or at least, the ones I did not want close by, fear me. Everything would work around me, much like in the OT actually.

The God of Abraham is POWERFUL, and he destroys distance...